Beam Me Up, Scotty

You know what I love about California? Everyone has rights. Well, mostly. Okay, some. But everyone Wants them, that’s for sure. For example, I want the right to breathe my air free of cigarette smoke. After all, I only smoke at the bar, and I only go on weekends and Monday holidays.  And occasionally for midweek happy hour on a Tuesday and/or Wednesday. So I shouldn’t be forced to suck down someone else’s bad habit on a regular basis.  To guarantee me my rights, smoking is Against the Law in California. Well, not everywhere. Just inside. And within 50 feet of inside. And near outside places that serve food. And on the beach. But drinking on the beach is against the law anyway, so that doesn’t matter?

Talking on your cell phone while driving your car is also against the law. As it should be. I have the right to feel safe while traveling on the street or highway whether I am a pedestrian jay walking or a fellow driver/make up putter oner/burger eater/chain smoker (still legal in my car), so you need to put that device Down before you cause more accidents. And by down, I mean on your knee. No, not that knee--that one is for steering the car.  Or, if you’re smart, like the rest of us, you can just hold it away from your face. That’s right, officer, it’s not a Phone, it’s Star Trek Communicator. And (so far) Communicators are not against the law.